She failed to make this child on her possess, it belongs to you as well. Your Guide to the First Trimester of Pregnancy, Your Guide to the Second Trimester of Pregnancy. Ask Anna: I'm pregnant with my ex's baby, but he doesn't want the child. Stay strong, reach out for support. ... And save me she just gave birth BS i had a liver transplant and was back on the horse in 6 months while my ex was filing for divorce after finding out i wasn’t checking out. Then the ground shifted. She goes by way of an awfully tricky emotional time, and the hormones can drive them loopy, so her back and forth can also be about that too...Take it with a grain of salt and hold displaying her that you're there for her. i would only hope that he takes  responsibility once the baby gets here. I think it just really comes down to whether YOU are willing to do this, and if YOU have good support from family and friends who will be there for YOU!! What to Expect has thousands of open discussions happening each day. I'm going to let him miss out because that is his choice. If you recognize her good sufficient to grasp she did not cheat on you or did not sleep with someone very quickly after the damage-up on the re-bound, then that is cool. i know that all my hard work and love sweat, sleepless night, tears are all worth it and i wouldn't trade them for any thing. He tried to convince me not keep it, doesn't want to be apart of our lives and frankly, the … He was actually excited to sign it that day. You're def not alone!!! My children reside with my ex husband and I get the kids on the weekends. You two can come up with a plan on where to go with your relationship and when you'd both be ready for a baby. They probably don’t feel 100% comfortable around you right now. Your ex is a terrible human being, and frankly I would insist she tell the daughter she doesn’t plan to remain in her life now or in the future. That may be the best you can do. We used to be really good friends for 6 years. I can only wish him happiness. Your ex sounds immature and may not face up to his responsibilities but it is better to give him that chance to be involved in your baby's life so when she gets older, if he IS in contact, she can make her own mind up about him. GIRL IS TRYING PUT A LAWSUIT ON ME? You do have a say. so you getting some kid to carry your name is more important to you than the child being comfortable within his/her own family? Relationships - when do they get better?? 9. Thoughts? I remember being absolutely gutted. Your baby will be the best gift you will ever receive, even in a not so perfect situation. At what age should kids stop playing on park playgrounds? But the most common one is that your ex is breadcrumbing you and wants to bring a reaction out of you. 10 Answers. I was in the exact situation. This action cannot be undone. Tell her that you will take her to court over custody and that if she won't work with you concerning the baby that you will go for full custody! My ex is like gum on the bottom shoe. At least you aren't shirking your responsibilities. (Brand X Pictures /Handout) We work hard to share our most timely and active conversations with you. For every one question like this coming from a man on Quora, I see at least ten questions from women who have been abandoned by boyfriends after finding out they are pregnant. You’ve got to connect with them first and get them feeling comfortable around you. You're both entitled to having a say in your child's life and being a part of it, but if you're not together and the kid will have a half sibling, and seeing as it's the mother who gives birth and goes through all of the pain, along with permanent damage to the body, it only makes sense that she at least keeps her own last name on the child. For example, your boyfriend might decide at this time he does not want a baby, but after the baby is born he may change his mind, or even start a relationship with his child years later. I see where you are coming from mate but unless you marry her she has the right to give the child her last name. Isabela on August 27, 2018: My ex said this “I don’t even know you anymore and don’t ask why” what is that supposed to mean. I would ask her to compromise and hyphenate it so the baby has both your last names.. reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts. ... “Please baby, don’t break up with me. It is going to be a tough road ahead of you but it is so worth it. In a variety of ways, having the baby entails conditions and obligations that he doesn’t want. Me and her don’t get along. My boyfriend doesn't want our baby :((86 Posts) Add message | Report. 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Your ex is mean to you (and/or angry at you) most of the time. further why go back when the relationship lack any real love. Ask him why he doesn't want a baby, and share your thoughts on why you want a baby. That's what I've done. ? It means that your ex doesn’t want to be rude to you since you haven’t (completely) obliterated your self-respect just yet. Just give me one more chance. 3. Are you sure you want to delete your discussion? I hope this helped even a little. Honestly I think with this chick your going to have to go to court and get rights. Dated for 7 months and broke up and then found out I was pregnant. I chose to keep my baby because I wanted to and I'm sooooo glad I did! Still have questions? He moved on and had a gf the entire pregnancy and after I had DD. And be in the center lights. Don’t punish the child who mistakenly thought she should freely be able to visit a parent. Use of this site is subject to our terms of use and privacy policy. how weird would you feel having a different name to your sibling? Fast forward 5 months, I'm pregnant with my first too. What should I do? Break-ups can bring out the “mean” in … My ex doesn’t want to be a father to our child. If she meets a new guy who makes her feel strong surges of romantic and sexual love, she will naturally change her mind and want to … Ugh. Can't wait until March to meet her! It is SOOOO hard to agree when circumstances are like this. A 47-year-old man who wants a child wonders whether to leave his wife of 15 years because she doesn’t. and there are the days you just want to pull your hair out or go to a corner and scream or cry . “Find out why your partner doesn’t want a baby.”. Create an account or log in to participate. I hope things work out for all three of you. Thought I couldn't have children so one wild night in June and now I'm 5 months pregnant. If you want to get your ex to stop putting on this “tough” act, here’s what you need to know. So last year I had this girl friend but she broke up with me without knowing that she was pregnant, the baby is mine, (at least that's what she has told me) and I don't have a problem with providing support and being there for him, I told her I would help her and I would be responsible whenever she needed something for the baby, but last night when I asked her what name she chose for him she said some random name but he was going to have her last name and not mine, I asked her why and she said because she has both of her kids (she has a 2 year old already) to have the same last name, I told her I wasn't ok with that but the said that she didn't care, that she had already made the decision, it is very important for me that the baby has my last name, is my blood and my legacy buy don't know what to do, if there's a legal way to make this happen, please help me I need some advice on this, thank you in advance. My desire for a baby was more than a want; it was a need. Even if your ex is 100% sure right now that she doesn’t want an exclusive relationship, she can change her mind very quickly. After my son was born his Dad signed the affidavit acknowledging he was the bio Dad of our child. All he said was its not his and to get rid of it. HELP!!! I have a small party planned for my daughters first birthday and mentioned to my bf that I don’t want his sister invited. I just don't know how to go about delivery, when I should let him know I'm in labor.. Or what?! ask me any thing im here. I would also let her know that as the father of the baby you have the same parental rights as she does and that you can change the babies name and will. She has every right to use her name, and I agree with her and would do the same thing. Karyn16 that made me cry! That was the best decision I could have ever made. The two of you are not married. Anyone else? When your ex doesn’t contact you first and replies to your messages, it’s a good sign in a way. If you ex doesn’t want to hang out with you at all, chances are he is doing his best to create distance between you so he doesn’t lead you on. It really helps. That was July 1st, roughly a week later we got into an argument and stopped talking completely. even to day for the first time my youngest came up to me and said " mommy your the best mommy in the whole world." may be your mom or his if you feel comfortable of have her there will be a better. My Ex does not like my current boyfriend and is taking me to court stating my boyfriend is a bad influence and doesn't want the kids around him. The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of What to Expect. Whatever it is that you want me to do, I’ll do it. For the women: Who has had kids but hasn't been 100% sold on it? Try to see things from his point of view. Get some adults worried or attorneys, or some thing and do what you could to be part of the determination making and in all probability raising of this child if it is yours. Learn more about. Please whitelist our site to get all the best deals and offers from our partners. I've taken a look at other friends who are staying in dysfunctional relationships just so they can have a daddy for their baby and it makes me thankful for my situation. There are no guarantees in life that you won't end up doing it alone (even if you were married to the guy) just look at divorce rates nowadays. If you're each teens, whether over 18 or now not, i would get your dad and mom worried in this. Guest over a year ago. My boyfriend does not have custody of his own children and my boyfriend does live with me. Your ex knows that if they give you a “reason”, you may try to change their mind, or do everything to try to make the relationship work — something they don’t want you to do. Answer Save. I've seen him twice since that conversation and both times he happened to show up where I was. We respect everyone’s right to express their thoughts and opinions as long as they remain respectful of other community members, and meet What to Expect’s Terms of Use. May I add that this is typically for unmarried couples(the affidavit). Respect his decision, and talk about your thoughts. some time their side of the family is the hardest to convince. That is no excuse in my book for a father to not have a proper to their child. You and she is going to consistently remorse it in the event you abort the little one...Trust me...I've visible it again and again. I have so many unanswered questions:(. My Snapchat picked up a face next to my child and put glasses there, then the glasses turned to look directly at me? but when i  i got their first smile or laugh, hugs or kiss it keeps me going. I'm in a similar situation, one night, to many drinks and an ex boyfriend who was told he couldn't have babies. Fast forward 5 months, I'm pregnant with my first too. Should I accept it? Perhaps you can compromise with first and middle names honoring your side of the family? I would also save texts with your communications and make a plan on how you will care for the baby, get a caregiver whether it be your mother or someone else, set up a nursery in your house, get a doctor for the baby, etc everything set up so when you go to court you can show them that you have done all this for your child and persuade them that the mother isn't always the correct choice for custody! Dr Ashwini Nabar. That is additionally the following factor you'll want to be certain of...That there rather is a child and that it is yours..Does not topic if she will probably be insulted, if there is any hazard that it could not be yours, get it checked. Get your answers by asking now. ***I know there’s a lot of people who are sick and tired... Find advice, support and good company (and some stuff just for fun). I think its sad that good fathers only get their children on weekends and moms get 5 days almost automatically... My first question is how historical are you and the way historical is she? I love you. If she doesn’t want a daughter - she doesn’t get to dictate things daughter does. My ex doesn’t contact me first, but replies. Chris Smith, MD answered this Pregnant, But Husband Doesn't Want The Baby . My ex talks to me and then ignores me. As far as delivery, I had an emergency c section, I told him as soon as I found out and he came to the hospital but I had my mother in the room with me. ***Update: after a long 10 hour work day on 12/10, I ended up packing up some items and left after another fight. Relevance. My ex is not around much at all but some how I make it work. I hate how he is such an awesome father for his daughter but could care less about his 2nd child. RedEye | Aug 07, 2017 at 9:50 AM . Answer. Though I talk about how long you should stay in no contact, many people I speak with break because they believe that contacting their ex will cause something to happen.. Or they fear that their ex has forgotten them during no contact.. my ex tells me he doesnt want to get back together but he tries to talk to me often and gets upset because he thinks i dont want to talk to him. Open this photo in gallery: David Eddie. BabyCenter India's expert obstetrician and gynaecologist. He just wants a puppet. What about her legacy and her blood? I rememember my partner telling me on one of my birthday weekends away that he didn't want any more kids. My ex girl friend is pregnant but doesn't want the baby to have my last name? Something similar except the guy n I were never exclusively dating. Join Yahoo Answers and get 100 points today. They usually then schedule a … There is no legal way of making this happen, just love your son and be the father he needs. Here are 10 big reasons why she doesn’t want sex, and what you can do. MORE: The Top Signs Your Ex Wants You Back. ... And let's face it, plenty of men find ways not to provide for their child - I have personal experience of that, and my ex wanted our child. My Ex is Confused and Doesn’t Know if She Wants to Be With Me or Not. Are you sure you want to delete your comment? As long as you are happy with your decision to have this baby then everything will work out. It wasn’t too big but I wasn’t going to wait around for a bigger one. It didn’t help that my ex got so angry with me that at one point he threatened not to bring my son back. I then felt like an awful mother because I didn’t want my … How do you think about the answers? he said he wants me to approach him and talk confidently and not feel negative about myself but when i try to go up to him it feels like he wants to walk away. Suggest that the child will have both of your names, problem solved. I was seeing my bd for about 4 months no exclusively when my birth control failed. I'm in dire need of advice. Thinking, “my ex doesn’t love me anymore” is heartbreaking, and you can’t wait around doing nothing, especially if you don’t want to lose hope and if you believe in your relationship. While relationship expert Emma Davey agrees, she says that it’s not an unusual conflict to arise – especially in relationships with larger age gaps. Unfortunately, there's no easy answer to this question and often mothers-to-be find themselves in this dilemma.
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